How he could acquire such a delicacy was a quite the dilemma, it’s not as if there were any gods randomly strolling through tatarus, the only ones that came through here didn’t feel like they’d taste well anyway…
what would he even say, “oh, Hades, Lord of the underworld, shepherd of restless souls, arbiter and judge eternal, master of the dead, keeper of the gates of tatarus…. I would ask thee of a slice of thine divine finger, if its not too inconvinient, for it is delicious in mine sight”
He’d just get his sentence extended, not that there could be any extentions to eternal.
Or he could make it worse, he thought about that for a second.
He knew each of the gods had chipped in for this most special of punishments, he just had a hard time figuring out which part they were responsible for and he’d had time to think about it, lots of time.
Zeus thunderhead gave the order off course, whilst the others stared in dumb shock, then that tomboy athena had spoken up, providing the idea that he should be tormented with food… He agreed with the others, it was a fitting punishment, the bitch.
The others were quick to follow up, Lord Hades, king of the emo, provided the real estate, a nice neighbourhood in tatarus, not much screaming here, all the better to hear your own groans of agony.
All this wouldn’t have been possible without the twisted mischief of Hermes however, he’d come up with the idea of satisfaction that was just out of reach, combined with the jealous cruelty of Hera, she’d practically leaped with joy at punishing another one of zeus extramarital children, her piece of the puzzle was this cursed immovable but still sensitive body.
Then came the finishing touches, a spirit that was still capable of eating and drinking and could therefore feel hunger and thirst was the twins contribution, it was probably a nice bit of complex anatomical procedures, cheers to their medical understanding, he hailed.
From haephestus and poseidon came the means by which fresh untainted water remained in the cess pit that was tatarus, this was the only part he was grateful for, he couldn’t imagine swimming in one of the five rivers that flowed down here, how would it feel knee deep in the phlegethon for all eternity?
And finally we get to the last bit, the crowning glory, the essence of his love of food was drawn out by Aphrodiety, Demeter then used that as the template for the work of art that hung over his head… He risked a glance, succulent, tasty, how could a fruit even taste like sweetbread?
It took all his will to tear his gaze away, it was partly fuelled by his curiosity concerning the last two members of the pantheon, Ares had definitely seemed indifferent, everyone knows he enjoys anything to do with chopped up body parts….
It was dionysus he was suspicious of, he knew him well, demigods had knowledge of each other as a rule, even if dionysus had been promoted to loftier places he still retained that nasty streak that was present in their genes, his was probably a last minute surprise, perhaps the fruit was poisoned with the juices of some deadly fruit, wine did not necessarily have to be made from normal grapes after all…
Or maybe it was thorns, if he ever managed to reach the fruit through interference, maybe vicious torture inducing thorns would snake out and take hold of him.
That was still in the impossible future though, and if there was anything he had left, it was time.
Lots of time.