Category Archives: quotes…wishes…..dreams

Orange and Black

transit_mercury-2006

His words reminded me of that time.

I was young, and you were a vision, clad in orange and black. I swear, those clothes were harvested from the dreams of wistful angels, and they were a mere highlight to your radiance. I called out to you that day, and you turned, and the light of the sun became secondary.

Well, you couldn’t really blame me, I had to stare, and in worship, take in every scorching detail. Time passed…

And still I stared, brain reduced to mayonnaise by the glare, all those fine cells containing the reason I called you, how not to be a statue, how to freaking blink. Continue reading

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Unconditional

il_570xN.670859496_r6e7The wind breaks the silence, it’s whispering cuts through it like the armoured head of the dread crocodile that swims the river Nile.

Our insecurities whisper also, of a multiple of possibilities, a clamour of thoughts. Each more final, more damning than the other.

It is a fearful thing. Weakness. Ones perception is always narrowed towards it as it worms it’s way through mind and soul.

I desire just two things, two acts to rid me of this malady, to heal my soul and free my spirit.

I wish of you to know who I am, and in that knowledge, understand me. That is the first wish.

Lastly I wish you to tell me, to whisper in my ear that despite my flaws, my shortcomings. I wish you to tell me you love me.

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Love Unrequited

Have you ever felt it?

It begins as a silent shock deep within your chest

It just sits there, growing…

Reminding you of what you would never have

Screaming silently at the injustice of it all

And all the while

You’d try to understand why it wasn’t enough

Try to think of what you could do to change it

It’s a beautiful feeling, really

Both the the intense immediate pain

And the enduring despair afterwards

For a time it bestows upon your heart impenetrable armour

You can’t harm what’s already destroyed

For a season it warps space and time

No thoughts or actions  can escape the gravity of the void

The emptiness created

When you rip out your heart

intending an exchange

And find only dust

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What next…

For the first time in forever

I’m not sure what to do with myself

I’ve wanted this for so long

So much that I can’t remember a time that I didn’t

And now it’s here.

I’ve got no more diabolical schemes

There’s no more need for insidious plans

What do you strive for when you have everything?

Do you reminisce about the past?

What i do is self sabotage

Which is highly illogical in its own right

Truly, I don’t know how to be content

Truly, I don’t want to be content

I fear it breeds complacency… The bastard beget of boredom

And where does that leave me?

No.

I’ll have to do what I do best

I’ll just have to want more…

Of you.

(back to the drawing board then…)

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daydreams

What?

Nothing, just wallowing in the silence of unvoiced thoughts

When?

Before, now…. forever

How?

I keep all that jealousy and hope sealed, a large wad of clamped emotions

Why?

Because I’m in love with you, stupid.

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So I woke up today bursting with so many short snips of randomness, I’ve decided to share….

Everything worth fighting for is won without fighting” – Trull sengar, I think.. midnight tides, fourth in the malazan book of the fallen.

and so he told me “he brings with him peace….the peace of the sword….the sword of death, you must accept!!! You must accept!!!”. So I dismembered him.

Lies are a blessing only to those who are continually privileged with cold truths, that is why I cherish the cast of illusions.

The unaligned only know solitude, their only power is one of surprise…. baring that, they are nothing.

Unlike most things, too much despair is a good thing, it brings in its wake desensitization. The ability to laugh at ones own misfortune becomes a valued virtue, eventually.

a kind of fruit from the tree of the mind

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